Our Brain is Either Open for Growth and Learning or Closed for Protection.
With Stress, brains close for protection.
When our brain is open, growth, learning and connection can happen.
When our brain is closed for protection, our need for safety and survival takes over.
Our brain cannot be in both positions, open and closed, at the same time.
When fear, shame, or punishment enter the room, even when delivered gently, a child’s brain shifts into protection mode.
The brain closes the gate. Learning stops.
Even though it may feel like your child is ignoring you, their biology is protecting them.
Peaceful Parenting focuses on keeping the brain open, so learning, connection, and cooperation can happen again.
Dr. Nancy Buck teaches parents how to keep their own brains open and in growth mode.
She also helps you learn to teach your children how to do the same for themselves.
When your children are open, they are more likely to engage with you. They will connect with you, hearing, and cooperatively learning how to get what they want and need effectively, responsibly and respectfully.
The Originator of the Developmental Model of Peaceful Parenting
Psychology Today | U.S. News and World Report | Complete Wellbeing Magazine | Oprah and Friends | USA Today | The Matt Townsend Show | Colorado radio programs
The Method in Action
Stop punishing the behavior.
Behavior is never the child's problem.
For a child, their behavior is sending a message of what they want and need.
Parents, when you learn to start decoding your child’s behavioral message, everything changes and improves!
Behavior is not random. It’s purposeful, although it may not be effective, responsible or even safe. It’s a non-verbal means of communication.
From a child's point of view their tantrums, refusals, and backtalk are not their problem. It’s the best means they have to communicate that something is wrong. Using behavior instead of words, they are letting us know that they are not getting what they want and need.
This is their signal to us. Peaceful Parenting will help you decipher their message.
Dr. Buck teaches parents to stop asking “why”and start asking better, more effective questions. Parents will learn to ignore the unwanted “misbehavior” ( at least initially) and start exploring what the child wants, since that’s what is driving your child’s behavior. Once parents learn to decode behavior, power struggles turn into conversations.
Defiance turns into dialogue.
This is not permissive parenting.
Peaceful Parenting is a better, more grounded approach that focuses on your child’s inner world helping them grow into independent, responsible and genuinely respectful people.
A New Role for Parents
From Controler to Coach
You are not here to control your child.
You are here to teach them how to control themselves.
Dr. Buck shows parents how to step out of the constant push and pull without giving up power.
It transforms power over into power with.
This approach replaces punishment with responsibility,
Fear with understanding,
Reaction with leadership.
Peaceful Parenting is not soft. It is loving.
It is calm, firm, and deeply respectful.
Meet Dr. Nancy Buck
A calm voice. A clear framework. Decades of experience.
Dr. Nancy Buck is a developmental psychologist and a leading voice in Choice Theory psychology.
For more than 30 years, she has helped parents, schools, and organizations move away from fear based discipline toward understanding how human behavior works.
Her approach is grounded in biology, not blame.
High in accountability.
Rooted in compassion.
Tested across generations and cultures.
She is also a parent of identical twin sons, who she often calls her greatest learning laboratory.
Whether you are raising toddlers or teenagers, navigating co- parenting, or simply trying to bring more calm into your home, Dr. Buck gives you the instruction manual humans are born with but are not taught how to read.
She is based in Denver, Colorado and works with parents across the United States and beyond.
Book a Private Session with Dr. Buck
90 Min for $90 Clarity Session
1 hr 30 min • $90
Guidance on Your Nightstand:
A Book to Guide your Learning and Understanding
It’s easy to be the kind of parent you want to be when your children are safely tucked into bed at night. But how do you become that parent when they are getting into everything and driving you crazy?
Dr. Nancy Buck’s quintessential guidebook offers practical strategies for the moments that leave you baffled—from bedtime battles and biting to homework struggles and teenage silence.
Stop asking, "Why won't they listen?" and discover the "Magical Question" that actually works. Move from the exhausting game of trying to control behavior to building a relationship built on internal motivation and peace.
“Dr. Nancy Buck presents a clear, comprehensive process to help parents develop and maintain the vital relationship necessary for a healthy future for our families and our nation. Peaceful Parenting is a desperately needed book addressing parenting, an area that truly needs a fresh approach.”
Dr. William Glasser
Founder of Reality Therapy, Choice Theory, and Quality Schools
President, William Glasser Institute